Who Am I?
By Judy Bauman
After my soul has left my body and my bones have returned to dust, what will be remembered of me? Do those who love me know who I have been, and why I have done the things I have done? Have they understood that the only reason I have had the capacity to love them as deeply as I have, is because Christ clothed me in His love? He has been the deepest love of my life. I pray they find rest in the same loving arms I have, and that they have made Him Lord in their lives as a result of my example.
I was awakened by God's loving touch within me. The healing that has taken place in my heart and soul is all the proof needed for me to know that God chose to work within me. If in my short lifetime, I have glorified God, then all of my life's dreams have been realized. God's will has been for me to live my whole life, not bits and pieces of it, in His presence and give Him all that I am. The constant search for fulfillment left me weak. Nothing filled me. My capricious lifestyle only left me feeling as if I were only chasing after the wind. (Ecc 2:24-26) No matter how much of life I ate, I was famished, and no matter how much of life I drank, I continued to thirst. Jesus gathered my fragments made me whole. He filled the empty hole that was my life. (John 4:1-26)
Jesus healed my grieving heart, and lifted cursing and drink from my lips. He did this simply because I asked Him. He heard my cries. Jesus came and smiled upon me and gave me hope-- the hope to which He has called me. (Eph 1-18) He set me free. (John 8:36) I have lived in God and He has lived in me. Jesus chose me and I have known His voice. (John 10:3) I yearn for His word, love, and wisdom; His faith, grace, peace, mercy, and glory. My goal is to live in a manner pleasing to my Lord, then rest in His arms. I want Him to say to me, "Well done good and faithful servant! Come and share your Master's happiness." (Matt 25:23)
In His Word, the Bible, Jesus promises that if we love Him, we will obey His teachings, then He and the Father will come and make a home in us. (John 14:23) I have known this to be true. Jesus is not some character in a book, a great teacher who lived 2000 years ago, or a deranged lunatic who thought himself God. Jesus is the only begotten Son of the One Living Almighty God, Maker of heaven and earth. I sincerely asked Him to forgive my many iniquities and invited Him into my life. Christ made a home in me. Through the power of His Holy Spirit, He has comforted, led, and freed me from the chains, the sins that formerly kept me shackled.
My hope is that I have lived as a reflection of Jesus' light on this dark, cold, and lonely world. When someone needed to be loved, I hope to have been of comfort. For those who hungered and need to be filled, I hope to have shared my food. In a parched world where one could be quenched by drinking from the Living Well, I hope to have handed them a cup.
As an ambassador of the Lord Jesus Christ, I hope those who have known me will have seen Him in my words and in my deeds. I pray that they see the Savior in the love I have given, the songs I have sung, the provisions I have shared, and teachings the Holy Spirit revealed through me. May all glory and honor go to Him for any and all things I have done well.